All about grief and loss
All about Grief and Loss
Grief is a normal, natural reaction to experiencing loss. Unfortunately it’s a necessary and painful part of life. People experience a variety of emotions including sadness, fear, panic, anger, disbelief and guilt after a loss and sometimes these feelings are so intense that they feel like they’re never going to end.
Loss can come in a number of forms such as losing a loved one, which is often the most intense type of loss. People also grieve when a relationship ends, they find out a loved one is sick, they lose a pet or they lose a job and their financial security. Grief is the process of adjusting to the dramatic change in your life and learning to live in a new way without your loved one or without what you previously had.
It’s a natural reaction to want to avoid these intense feelings of grief. However grief when it’s experienced and expressed is much healthier in the long term and gives you a better chance to grow from the experience and rebuild a life. You may feel like you can’t cope and you can’t go on, but you can and over time it will get better.
You may find it useful to read the stories of other people who have experienced grief and how they coped with it.
How do people cope with grief (there is no one way)
The short answer is everyone is different in the way they cope with grief. People grieve differently, for different lengths of time and feel different things in the process. It’s almost impossible to compare your experience of grief with someone else’s. There is no set timetable to grief and you need to give yourself time to move through it, without hurrying the process.
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, a psychiatrist in the 1960’s developed a model called the “five stages of grief” based on her work with terminally ill patients. These stages have since become a commonly used model to describe the stages people go through when experiencing a loss:
Denial: “ This isn’t real, it can’t be happening to me”
Anger: “Why me, this isn’t fair”
Bargaining: “I’ll do anything if I just could have......”
Depression: “I’m so sad, I just can’t be bothered doing anything”
Acceptance: “It’ll be OK, somehow I’ll get through this”
These stages are different for different people. Some people experience some stages and not others, some people move through the stages in a different order. Some people go back and forth through the stages and some don’t experience any of these stages. So if you are feeling some of these feelings than that’s a normal experience but if you’re not, that’s OK as well.
As well as the feelings we have described above, many people also feel guilt, fear, shock and disbelief. Not all the symptoms are emotional, many people also have physical symptoms including fatigue, nausea, weight loss or gain and insomnia.
If you or someone you know is experiencing grief or loss Select Counsellors can help you find a counsellor who specialises in grief and is the best fit for you.
Select Counsellors provides a unique client counsellor matching service to ensure you see the right parenting counsellor for you, first time. We have a pool of highly trained Sydney based counsellors, psychologists, psychotherapists and psychiatrists and will match you with the right therapist based on important information collected in a personalised assessment about you and your needs. At Select Counsellors our key priority is Finding you the One. To book an assessment click here or call on 1300 123 680 to speak in person with a Select Counsellor.
Click on the links below to find out more information on grief and loss:
The Helpful Guide